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Archive for the ‘Amy Winehouse’ Category

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Amy Winehouse, the epitome of all things unsexy.

Mar 23, 2008 Author: | Filed under: Amy Winehouse, amy winehouse cutting skin

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No matter how many times I think that Amy Winehouse has reached the limits of all things unsexy, she breaks a new barrier. This time it’s with those weird pouches on her face and of course, the new and fresh cutting marks. Either Amy is suffering from that weird cutter mental disease again, or someone needs to buy her a cutting board for the asparagus.

I can honestly say I wouldn’t even drink a cup of coffee after her. Actually, I bet the coffee itself begins to evaporate when Amy looks at it. Like mixing weird chemicals together, Medusa’s eyes and Central American beans; a chemical reaction is only natural.

I think Amy needs to check into the same rehab joint as Britney Spears is in. You know, the one that takes dried up raisins and turns them into pretty puffy grapes again?

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    • Amy Winehouse unaffected by broken childhood.

    Mar 13, 2008 Author: | Filed under: Amy Winehouse, amy winehouse cheaters

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    Just kidding, she went nuts. Apparently she knew that her dad was cheating on her mom. This all happened when she was a little kid. Amy says she wasn’t really affected by it all. NOT!

    She must have just let it all build up until she completely imploded mentally and emotionally. Wackjob!

    People says, “The children used to call Jane ‘Daddy’s work wife,’ ” Winehouse says on the program One Life: Rock Star Parents, to be aired next week.
    He says her angry song, “What It Is About Men,” refers to his behavior.
    “It is easy for me to say it is my fault, and that had I been a better parent this would not have happened. But who knows whether it would or not?” he says.

    Daddy’s work wife! That’s awesome!

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    • Amy Winehouse declared “contagious”

    Mar 3, 2008 Author: | Filed under: Amy Winehouse, disease

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    Aaaah, Amy the woes never stop, do they? The singer has just been diagnosed with a bacterial skin infection. The nasty pimple-like lumps are not only kinda, uhm, gross, but they can quickly spread to the rest of the body.

    The singer isn’t hiding, though. “She’s never been one to care what people think,” said her rep.

    Is it just us, or are we starting to feel just a little bit itchy?

    Source: Rachel

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    • Amy Winehouse is a hotel maids worst nightmare.

    Feb 23, 2008 Author: | Filed under: Amy Winehouse, amy winehouse trash hotel room blake

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    Honestly, why would you expect Amy Winehouse to trash a Hotel room? I mean, come on, I am sure she is in bed early every night watching reruns for Friends and Seinfeld.

    Not the case. Apparently….hope your sitting down…..spills drinks all over Hotel rooms. Oh, also, she smokes in non-smoking rooms.

    The Sun says, Booze was spilled all over the wooden hallway and cigarette butts, countless bottles of champagne and unwashed knickers were all over the floor. The blackened bath had to be scrubbed and unclogged after she dyed and washed her famous beehive in the tub. She had even taken a large mirror off the wall and placed it on the floor. Staff were baffled why. I’m not.

    I wonder if when she check into a Hotel they just automatically put her down for a smoking room. I wonder what they would do if she asked for non-smoking? I love how the staff was baffled. After they cleaned up, they went directly back down to their caves.

    And….about that Blake guy….the one that tried to overdose in jail.

    The singer was in tears as she spoke to Blake through a pane of glass, in a room separate from other prisoners. Their marriage has been under strain since we revealed Blake has been trading signed photos of her for heroin. 

    I want to go to this jail. Sounds like the stuff you get in there is sooo much better than the stuff you get from all the Sig Ep kids on Campus drive.

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    • Amy Winehouse breast leave clues behind.

    Feb 19, 2008 Author: | Filed under: Amy Winehouse, amy winehouse boobs enhancers

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    Yep, they have always looked mysteriously good even when one would suspect that they would be troubled. I mean, I don’t think having all that meth blown off of them would keep them healthy. Well, in another round of How the Winehouse Turns, we find our answers, where else, but at a party.

    Page Six says, “She left a pair of boob enhancers - like chicken cutlet things to push up your boobs - and some hair extensions in the toilet,” our spy said. Later, Winehouse and Wood went to his apartment with a group of people who “were all getting drunk - except for them.” 

    Um, right. Weird. Oh well, at least they stay looking fit.  The hair extensions were pretty much expected. I wonder what keeps her …. ugh, I have to keep this baby work safe, so I will not go there.

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